Many advance the notion that marriage is filled only with bliss and perfections I believe that being part of a marriage is a wonderful experience. However, people always seem to omit the existence of the MAZE. The maze refers to challenging seasons and difficult experiences which affect the marriage and the happiness of the marriage partners. I mean older folks do hint at such experiences with their wonderful clichés like: “don’t quit” or “God is the third chord in the marriage”. These statements are meant to be helpful but provide little direction for getting through the maze. It’s like a friend who has the directions to a place you wish to go but withholds these directions and tells you to make sure to get there.
Why is this so? It’s because no one wants to actually admit there is a maze because everyone pretends as if marriage is supposed to be perfect. It is! But mazes have existed for a very long time and they continue to exist. Adam and Eve, the first humans who were created, had to deal with mazes of giving in to temptation an engaging in a sinful act, and facing the consequences of this sin. We all have our own mazes to go through!
This is true for all marriages and through this blog post, I am going to be revealing specific directions for getting through the maze. You may wonder why I am doing this. It’s not because I want everyone to know my business in this information/’macco’ age but because the transmission of false information about marriage to singles and newly-wed couples, may lead to frustration and disappointment when mazes in the marriage are discovered. When such discovery takes place some even opt out of marriage, blindly thinking that in their next marriage there will be no mazes because they will find someone who will make them happy all the time!
Prayer can be described as the torchlight which will get you through the maze. Couples are often advised to pray for each other and this sounds all mushy and holy but this isn’t always the case. Yes, there are times when you’re asking God to bless your spouse but the next 20-40% of the time, you need that prayer line for the times when you are extremely angry with your spouse and there are no Christian words that you can think to say and you just need to offload! If you were to say these words to your spouse, by the time you’re finished he/she will be crushed, and we do have the power to do this, especially as women. Don’t do it! This is the time when you need to go to God and tell Him exactly how you feel. God is okay with you being angry He gets angry too! By the time you’re finished offloading God is going to give you one of three main solutions.
His assurance that He will handle the situation. He might then cause your partner to do exactly what you’ve been praying for without further discussion on the matter. This might seem like a miracle and it is! I have had a few of these miracles …praise Jesus!
The next solution God may give you is a combination of codes to enact. These are words to lovingly and calmly say to your spouse so that he or she actually hears what you’re saying and responds lovingly This saves hours of talking and arguing.
The third main solution God may give you is to say nothing and keep praying while God takes the time to teach you how to deal with the situation. Even if you have to cry in anger at God’s method of addressing the situation (as I have done), stick with it because you could make the situation worse and have to wait even longer for a solution if you disobey. For this type of situation, you may even have to fast! At the end of it though, God will come through for you. Even if your spouse does not change in accordance with the way you prayed, God will give you the code you need to work with i.e. the wisdom and understanding you need to still have a successful marriage
Singles don’t be discouraged. Marriage is a blessing but every blessing comes with its own maze so the pretense ends here. Marriage is not perfect or characterized by consistent happiness. It does not solve your problems or end your mazes. Mazes exist in every stage of life including marriages! That’s the real truth! But allow God to equip you to work through every single maze you encounter and to help you to and your partner to learn, grow, and change, as you journey together.